I recently returned from doing my DREAM TRIP to New Zealand that I’ve wanted to do since I was 14. It took over half my life to actually do it. Why? Because I freaking waited to go with someone.
But, finding someone who shares your travel ambition, and the time and resources to do it…well, it just never happened for me. And, I was sick of waiting, and I was becoming increasingly disappointed with myself for not doing something that I clearly was capable of as a GROWN ASS WOMAN with a JOB and an APARTMENT and a LIFE.
So? I did it.
Air Canada had a smoking deal on what turned out to be their inaugural flight from Auckland to Vancouver, and the price was too good to pass up. After a night of anxiety and admonishing myself, I pulled the trigger. I was going. This was it. It was happening. I had 3 months to plan. My first solo trip.
Now, I KNOW, I went to the safest place on the planet. They literally have zero non-people predators (although I was dive-bombed by two kaka parrots in Abel Tasman which was most certainly a PERSONAL ATTACK.) So, take this all with a grain of salt, but I thought it would be worthwhile to share how I got it done. There wasn’t a lot on this topic before I left, so maybe someone else will find this helpful.
1. RECON
I didn’t realize until I booked my flight, but I had recon’ed the sh*t out of New Zealand over the years. As soon as I booked, I wrote down a list of the spots/destinations I wanted to go. I found these spots either from hearing about friends’ experiences or by trolling Instagram and people who live in the area. Instagram is great for finding cool, scenic spots. Just search the place you want to go, and you can get lots of photos/videos that will provide you with a great feel for the place and the ability to gauge if it’s your jam. Or, look at Google Maps. There’s a lot of marked scenic destinations there – also with accompanying photos/reviews – that make it really easy to find if a place is worth checking out.
I also bought the Lonely Planet guide (which felt like an obligation), but it was too full of text-heavy facts for post-work reading, so I just ended up thumbing through it a few days before I would go through the area I was heading to.
2. KNOW THAT YOU’VE GOT THIS
Man, I struggled with this one. It’s all well-and-good telling myself this now, snuggled safely back in Raincouver, but Imma tell this to you too, even if you don’t believe it yet. You’re capable, you’re an adult (probably), and you have the skills you need to do this by yourself. I didn’t really have any massive epiphanies or Eat, Pray, Love-esque discoveries about myself, but the biggest take-away I had was that I was JUST FINE by myself. I’m almost entirely sure you’ll feel this way too. This was the biggest thing stopping me. If you’re searching for how to do a trip by yourself, you’re probably ready. When I was there, I was too busy living my life to be lonely, and hell, I spend most evenings by myself, anyways. Just do that in your destination.
3. GET A CELL PHONE PLAN
Some 20-year old kid offered me a Vodafone cell phone plan – with 7 more GB than my Canadian plan I might add – for $50 straight off the airplane. Google Maps became my co-pilot. I would dial in my driving route each morning, and Bluetooth it into my car speakers. I didn’t need the map visuals, just someone telling me I had 50-meters to turn left amidst my summertime Spotify jams. I always knew where I was and how to get where I was going, and knew I could reach out to people at any time. This provided a lot of peace of mind to go off the beaten path or make spontaneous decisions (like going to the Manawatu Scenic Route miles off course.) DO IT. Also, you can connect with anyone at home at any time. I never felt lonely, because I still had all my friends a few buttons away. With data/Internet, you can be with anyone, anywhere, at any time.
4. BE YOURSELF
I was quickly able to connect and get the best out of others just by being myself. The people I talked to were mostly in the service industry – servers, shop owners, tourism centre people etc. – but that did lead to real connection and real conversation. For example, I ended up talking to someone working at a winery (who was from BC), and we ended up talking for 2 hours and then having dinner. This is a great way to affirm how awesome you are to yourself. You get the benefit of plopping yourself into a land where no one knows you, and seeing what you get back. In many ways, I found this to be the most-rewarding (and perhaps most-needed) part of my solo adventure.
5. DON’T OVERTHINK IT
My anxiety all happened before pressing purchase on my flight tickets. After that, it was surprisingly calm and chill. And, you know what? The whole trip was calm and chill. Literally nothing went wrong for the whole month and there were zero moments of stress. You can plan for the worst, but honestly, just hope for the best. It’s probably what’s going to happen.
6. DO WHAT’S RIGHT FOR YOU
I often struggle with what others would want me to do. As the youngest child from a big family, I’m used to others leading, or being influenced by what others want. I often have to mentally combat what others might expect me to do. This is a very privileged thing to say, but hostels just really aren’t my jam (maybe it’s PTSD from university dorm days?) So, I mostly stayed in motels/hotels on my trip – getting a “last minute” hotel deal a couple of days before I arrived in a destination. Was it a bit more expensive? For sure. But, it felt best to me, and I had a great time. Know yourself and what makes you happy, and do that. You’ve only got yourself to please on this trip.
7. PLAN ON BEING FLEXIBLE
I had the luxury of being gone for a month. I booked hotels and knew where I would be for the first six day after arriving, but beyond that I left it open. A few weeks before I left for NZ, the South Island was essentially “cut in half” by flooding, so I wanted to wait and see what that situation was like before I booked anything there. I had a rough plan and a few options of driving routes, but I allowed myself to be able to decide to stay longer at places, or do a different route, should I want to. I ended up doing my “extension pack” drive down to the Catlins and Dunedin, and was ultimately grateful I did. I also ended up staying in spots I really liked for extra days, like Nelson and Wanaka. Build in some flexibility for things you love, and to GTFO of things you don’t.
8. FOLLOW YOUR FEELINGS
On this trip, I followed every good feeling I had, and it led to some of my favourite spots. Trust your instincts. Also, if someone enjoyed something, but you hate it? Bouncehouse.com. Don’t feel bad. Everyone recommended Tongariro Crossing, but it gave me the “no” feeling. I drove up the neighbouring Mt. Ruapehu and it gave me serious “get out” vibes. So, you know what? I did. No regrets.
Ultimately, I’m glad that this trip happened exactly when it did. I realize now that the person I’d been waiting to go with all along was a version of myself – one that had the confidence, time, and money to do it exactly the way I did. I’m not mad at myself for it taking so long, but I sure would have been if I never went at all. Regret is one thing we are absolutely assured of by not going – not being attacked, or getting lost out in the wilds of New Zealand by trying.
My best advice: just do the thing. You want to, you’re ready – you’ve got this.
